There have been so many times I have felt stressed and blue and thought, "I really should go for a walk or work out," only to have the next thought nix it in the bud, "Yeah, but I just don't feel like it." I really don't feel like it.
Depression strips me of my motivation and keeps me chained to the chair in which I am sitting. Every now and then, I'll push through and go for that walk or use the bowflex and I always feel so much better afterwards.
There is something about exercise that, for the moment, breaks those chains that keep me bound to the chair. My doctor says it releases endorphins, a chemical in my body that makes me feel good. So...if that is the case, why don't I always push through and go for that walk or head to the gym...some days it is just too much effort and lack of motivation.
Today was not one of those days though. I almost talked myself out of it, but now I have decided that I am just not going to get up and rush around and be tied to the clock unless I have appointments, I have freed myself to do what I want, when I want. So...I didn't get out and walk at 7:30 A.M. Who cares that it was 9:30 before I got over there? Who cares that it is just after 11:00 and I still haven't gotten into the shower yet? This is actually working for me and helping me deal with the depression.
I walked 1.5 miles...took me 30 minutes and my mind is clear without feeling blue. I am tired and ready for another nap, but I think that the shower will wake me up. Even if I don't get another thing accomplished today...I did accomplish something positive and just for me by getting out and making the effort to walk.
I am thankful for the little glimpses of hope that I see. It helps me to know that this too shall pass...just may take a little longer than I want it to.
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